Monday, March 25, 2013

she's living for this!

i like alot of things...like fer instance....
i like just about anything 80's

i like chrome colored walls

i really like apples...

and i really like em BIG!

but let's save that smut talk fer another blog...shall we...you dirty lil kittens!

cuz today i have with us...in my oraficial unisvere...all the way from the Big Apple...to the Minne-Apple...none other than the lovely and talented...
SHERRY VINE

so Sherry....i'm as pickled as a priest on sunday that you decided to take me up on my offer and come perform fer the flock of ferries and and non ferries in the Minne-Apple at the annual "April Showers bring BITCH FLOWERS" event at the Varsity Theater...have you ever performed in the Minne-Apple before?
I have a hard time remembering what I had for lunch but I think it's my first time in Minnie-Apple!  And let me tell ya, I can't wait to pop my Minnie cherry!

though you are internationally known and performed fer many thru-out the land...can ya give my legion of followers who may have not had the oppertunity to see you live...a lil backstory on how Sherry came about?
 I was getting my MFA in Acting and every time we read a play I identified with the leading lady.  It wasn't that I wanted to be a female but as an actor I wanted the juicy, emotional parts! lol.  I mean c'mon, Blanche is the part to play!  Or Hedda Gabler.  So I created Sherry in order to give myself a platform to sing songs and play roles I couldn't do as a man.  What started as a hobby turned into a career.  Then a joke lol!!

i know yer not gonna remember lil ol' me...but we actually met at the Barracuda club in the Big Apple about 3 years ago...(i was dressed as a lesbian or man drag if you will)...you were an absolute gem...and you were debut'n yer spoof of Lady GaGa's "bad romance" that you titled "shit my pants" fer the 1st time...which i had to come meet you after that hysterical rendition...how do you decide what artist/song to parody?
Of course I remember you - weren't we doing bumps off that go go boys tight ass?  So funny you were there for the premiere of the parody that changed my life lol.  I started doing parodies in high school, years before starting as Sherry.  It's just something I have always done.  And I've been doing Sherry for 21 years now!  So in the beginning it was just about the idea and making it funny.  I wasn't focused on what was the top hit of the moment.  Once YouTube came along it was about video parodies and certainly if the song was a hit this would lead to more views.  GaGa was a gift!!  There's just so much to parody.  

i actually have performed yer amazin' hit "you're a homo" a couple of times in my own shows...another fantastic spoof and actually a great political message of Lady GaGa's hit "alejandro"...have you ever gotten any feedback from celebrities that you've spoofed? and do you feel like it's an honor when other perform'n illusionists...like myself...perform yer brilliantly written songs?
I am sincerely thrilled when someone does one of my parodies!  What better way to be acknowledged than to have one's peers want to "do" you?   I've gone to cities where queens are like, "Do you mind if I do one of your songs?"  And I say, "Girl, please!!"  It makes me so happy!  Luckily, most of the celebs I really admire and parody (I do not do one's I don't like, I am a fan of Gaga, Madonna, etc) have been supportive.  Especially, Lady Gaga.  She has posted my videos on her site and fb and has written me twice.  She's totally cool and gets it.  Katy perry also tweeted my FireCrotch video.

like me being the unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of my own universe...and dirty gurl of the Minne-Apple...you've already established yerself as an accomplished perform'n illusionist for over 20 some years now...and you actually have yer own hit variety show

which pays homage to shows like the Carol Burnett Show...the Sonny and Cher Show and the Donny and Marie Show...but if you had to choose a panel of judges to put you in front of a fire'n squad to judge yer performance on stage like they do on RuPaul's Drag Race...who would be yer ideal panel?
Wow, that's a hard question lol.  I would want to pick people I admire and who inspire me but if they didn't like me I might be crushed! lol.  But of course,
Carol Burnett, Lady Gaga, Debbie Harry, Jackie Beat
and the director of my videos Francis Legge. Oh and my best friend who also directs SHE'S LIVING FOR THIS Josh Rosenzweig.  

and i just made this up...but here's a new game i think would be a hit segment on yer show "suck it...fuck it...or tuck it!"...basically...(and we'll keep this to any celeb live'n or dead...just to keep the necormaniacs happy) who would you suck? who would you fuck? and who would you like to tuck and put in a gown?
i'll start...Colin Farrel...Channing Tatum...and Daniel Craig...why not!

and yer choices in order?
LOL!
  
Well I would definitely suck Joe Manganiello 

fuck Tony Danza (1978!)

and tuck James Franco - he'd make a pretty queen!

i'm a hooker in heat with yer choices Sherry...grrrr...so before i turn it over...is there anything you'd like to whore out to my flock fer monetary value to you?
All my songs, DVDs and T-shirts can be found on www.sherryvine.com
I'll be selling blow jobs in the flesh!

now we've come to the part of the interview i like to call...
"can we talk about ME fer a change?"

basically Sherry what this means is...in yer best Barbara Walters pant suit...
ask me anything you wanna know about me...and i mean A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G under the rainbow...well except about rainbows...cuz that's just fuck'n lazy...
I want you to tell me who I have to fuck to get a Jack Daniels and ginger when I'm there!  lol.  Can't wait to have a blast in Minneapolis!!!

depend'n on yer flavor of the week Sherry...this is where i'll I-N-S-E-R-T my psuedo good friend RIK...who will do the trick...(or anything else you ask i'm sure) but there'll be a merried number of the boys at the bar who will be more than happy to fill you to the brim...with him...or WHATEVER you D-E-S-I-R-E! *wink*wink*...if not...i'll have my car parked out back in the alley and bring my chloryphorm spray fer back-up and we can just cherry pick the crowd...ok gurl!

i wanna thank the very immensely talented...out of this world beauty...
and very punctual i might add...SHERRY VINE!

to learn more about the great and powerful SHERRY VINE...touch here
to see the great and powerful SHERRY VINE hard...at work...touch here

and come see her make her glorious debut at the 6th annual...

so grab a mate and make it a date...and like always...remember to bring ya holla's and ya dolla's...cuz you won't wanna miss thee SHERRY VINE make'n her MInne-Apple debut...along with BITCH FLOWERS or KRYSTAL KLEER or FOXY TANN or MRS. SMITH or the SOLE to SOUL dancers or DJ RICO...or quite frankly...the best party in town...now it's time fer my to start rehearse'n...so if you wouldn't mind...
could you be ever so kind...and get off my dress!

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