popp'n puke'n pecker wrecker was glued to their magnavox television set on friday nites to watch the hot to trot cousins BO and LUKE DUKE played by heart throbbers TOM WOMPAT and JOHN SCHNEIDER buzz'n thru Hazzard county on the hit series "DUKES OF HAZZARD" until 1985
those more confused non homo's with their tingle'n tapper apparently were
more interested in DAISY parade'n around in her hiked up hysterectomy hot pants...seriously...get help...it's out there if you ask fer it (ummm...insert laugh here) played by the charismatically classy ass-kick'n CATHERINE BACH
who had all mooched off everyone's fav-o-rit silver haired moonshiner UNCLE JESSE played by DENVER PYLE
in the county of HAZZARD that was run by high cholesterol heart attacker BOSS HOGG and his bumble'n long arm of the law SHERIFF ROSCOE P. COLTRANE with his trusted basset hound FLASH and DEPUTY ENOS STRATE played brilliantly by SORRELL BOOKE...JAMES BEST and SONNY SHROYER
and of course we can't ferget about the awkwardly loveable ritual bath'n town mechanic COOTER played by BEN JONES
BUTT...this is a shepard to lost sheep
like many of the friday nite line-up shows pre #METOO #WOKEUP and
#MADONNAISSTILLTHEQUEENLIZZO light hearted slap-stick bumble'n comedy sitcoms like the "DUKES OF HAZZARD" would never survive any air born jumps in today's cautiously cantankerous climate...mainly due to the stereo typicalism...machoism...sexism...oh and that confederate flagism
say all what you wanna say about the history behind the GENERAL LEE's
roof top decoration...NOT ONE SINGLE gen X'er out there today gave 2 shits about the flag adore'n that 1969 carrot colored dodge charger...we all desperately wanted one from that silver bearded jolly plump A double snakes at xmas time to fling off our desk ramps at school in the 80's...with that said...
YES i understand the dark history behind the flag's symbol so don't go line'n up outside my shitbox to school me while yer wait'n fer the dunk'n donut live'n above me to pour you some freshly squeezed lemonada marinate'n in moonshine served in a chilled mason jar cuz it ain't happen kittens...everything has a history and some history deserves to be fergotten but it can never be erased...thanx to technology
those fans of the beloved buffoonery series suffered another tragic lose
recently at the hands of mother nature's off spring HURRICANE IDA when she came tear'n thru town like a bumble'n bitch on booze and right thru BO DUKE's backyard in Louisiana where the original wheels from the series had decided to retire
and though the current generation may have ZERO interest in tv's
most beloved iconic car...treasured fans can still flock to the fairgrounds in Tennessee to see one of their fav-o-rit famous cousins and taste the flaw in the slaw at the GREENE COUNTY FAIR this october
where you can get a chance to be up close and personal with HAZZARD COUNTY'S hottest hostess with the mostess CATHERINE BACH...so fasten yer seatbelts and click here fer tickets and times...y'all come back now...ya here?
now GET OFF MY DRESS!
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