skipp'n in the graveyard

with only a lil over a week from the wickedest nite of the year...

where all H-E-double hockey stix breaks loose

ummm...let me clarify...i'm not talk'n about the midterm elections

but since we're on the subject...finish choke'n down those caramel nuggity treats by nov 6th...and VOTE like you've neva voted before...human decency depends on it!

in the mean time kittens...since the crypt keeper had a play date with

the original top 20 countdown'n crooker a few years back...i hadda pull out the ouija board and try and make a connection...but no such luck...so i've decided to take over the reigns as the unintentionally internationally unknown top 20 countdown hostess of my own universe...

to keep yer toes a tapp'n while dance'n with the devil in yer best whore-ish look this hallowed eve...let's begin...shall we?

come'n in at # 20...MICHAEL JACKSON

"THRILLER"

no halloween season would be complete without this zombie classic from 1982

#19...ROCKWELL

"SOMEBODY'S WATCHING ME"

with a lil back-up help from the famous gloved one from above...this 80's jheri curl gave paranoid schizophrenics everywhere a voice

#18...NORMA TANEGA

"YOU'RE DEAD"

this hippie chickie beatnicke tells the dead to get yer affairs in order before ya start kick'n up daiseys

#17...MARILYN MANSON

"THIS IS HALLOWEEN"

originally sung by Danny Elfmann fer the Tim Burton classic "Nightmare Before Christmas"...turned out to be a satanic masterpiece fer the devil's prodigy child

#16...CHER

"HELL ON WHEELS"

before she was "dressed to kill" on her sold out tour...this raven beauty turned back time in her roller skates...ummm...that's like an ancient physical artform to the instant oatmeal generation

#15...RACHEL SWEET

"VOODOO"

best known fer sing'n the open'n theme on John Waters classic "HAIRSPRAY"...this lil kitten opened fer Bill Cosby in Vegas before she was a teenager

#14...ANNIE LENNOX

"LOVE SONG FOR A VAMPIRE"

this mousketeer's masterpiece was the theme song to Bram Stroker's DRACULA...cuz blood suckers need love to ya know

#13...MADONNA

"DEVIL WOULDN'T RECOGNIZE YOU"

the QUEEN known fer her pop infused ballads...conjured up love fer even Lucifer's fallen angel with this haunt'n ballad

and now...a long distance dedication to a lil girl from Michigan

who sold her soul...among a few other unmentionables...just to have a career...her letter reads..."now i lay me down to sleep...i pray the lord my soul to keep...fer if i die before i wake...i pray the lord i still have hitz to make"...well lil girl...here's yer long distance dedication from this drop dead Barbie doll KIM PETRAS

 

feature'n the MISTRESS OF THE DARK ELVIRA with "TELL ME IT'S A NIGHTMARE" who i had the pleasure of a private one on one with back in the 90's in her trailer...don't believe me...ask my dear friend Peetrinella...cuz they all hadda wait outside in the freeze'n cold that nite...and now...back to the countdown

come'n in at #12....FRANK N FURTER

"SWEET TRANSVESTITE"

this lil saucy number got caught up in the spider's web since the 70's and has been entertain'n the masses ever since with it's interactive applications

#11...RAMONES

"PET SEMATARY"

theme song to the Stephen King classic bare'n the same name...these guys were responsible fer the 3 chord thrash and punk sound...this was one of their biggest hits and a constant staple in their live shows

#10...NAHPI (N AMERICAN HALLOWEEN PREVENTION INITIATIVE)

"DO THEY KNOW IT"S HALLOWEEN"

the only charity song to hit my countdown...this fairly unknown tribute benefited UNICEF in 2005...with it's patronize'n attitude towards other charity singles like "DO THEY KNOW IT'S CHRISTMAS"...it's considered a complete classic to the undead...gathered together by a cast of spooktacular talents like ELVIRA...BECK...PEACHES...among many others

#9...LORI CHACKO

"ONCE BITTEN TWICE SHY"

 Lita Ford and Dale Bazio's love child was part of the best camp horror movie ever "ELVIRA MISTRESS OF THE DARK"...she'll drive a stake right thru yer earlobes

#8...NATCHA ATLAS

"I PUT A SPELL ON YOU"

this middle eastern twist on a classic will surely lobotomize yer mind

#7...KATE NASH

"SKELETON SONG"

easily mistaken as british singer LILY ALLEN...well...cuz that's who i thought it was til i researched the song...this lil number will surely rattle yer bones

#6...FRANK SINATRA

"WITCHCRAFT"

ol' blue eyes made it with the best of em back in his hay days by putt'n em under his spell with this smooth spellbind'n number

#5... DUSTY SPRINGFIELD

"SPOOKY"

a ghoulish lil ditty that'll surely put you in a devilish mood

#4...EARTHA KITT

"RATHER BE BURNED AS A WITCH"

a multi talented performer...best known as the villainous vixen Catwoman in the original Batman series in the late 60's...she purred like no other on earth

#3...LONE JUSTICE

"WAYS TO BE WICKED"

before song bird MARIA MCKEE broke out on her own...she fronted fer the band...who i had the pleasure to throw back goldschlagger shots on the back of her tour bus with my good friend Lisa when Maria played at First Avenue in the Minne-Apple in '96

#2...BOY GEORGE

"SATAN'S BUTTERFLY BALL"

though this chameleon was known fer a string of hits thru-out the 80's...he proved he could rock it out like the rest of em on the release of his brilliant hard edged masterpiece with a message "cheapness and beauty"

and my #1 all time fav-o-rit haunted hit...DEAD OR ALIVE

"SOMETHING IN MY HOUSE" 

the quintessential anthem fer anything that goes bump in the nite...lead singer PETE BURNS will make you howl at the moon with his infectious voice while skipp'n thru the graveyard at midnite

well...there ya have it kittens...this years top 20 ghoulish hitz from beyond

the graveyard...thanx fer tune'n in...well...time fer me to get to hot glue'n and rehearse'n fer my ghoulish return as thee unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist and hostess with the moistest mouth fer my return to the stage this sat oct 27th in WINONA MN at ED's NO NAME BAR...feel free to hop a plane if yer inclined to do so if you wanna come to the best hallowed eve's event around town...oh...and don't ferget to bring yer holla's and yer dolla's

now get off my dress!