IRISH YOU THE BEST

it's that time of the year once again when every laddie and gassy lassie

from Tom...Dick or Mary Jane hide'n in every nook and drunken cranny around the local liquor store to the communal wine taste'ns at their local parish that become instant honorary irish folk...from the irish asians to the irish africans and every AA drop-out in-between who use the excuse to bathe in green beer while drunkenly try'n to do the irish jitterbug in their granny's green knickers desperately search'n fer the pot of gold or at the very least a pot to puke in after try'n to shellack some random throat plunge'n shillelagh while simultaneously gett'n hit in the chin by their low swing'n shamrocks before they turn back into some unimportant non irish pain the ass by midnite without gett'n to taste me lucky charms i might add

this year i've decided to forgo all the shitty shenanigans and plop my puss

on the couch and watch my all time fav-o-rit irish flick "ONCE" again (twice already this week) about an irish vacuum repair guy GLENN HANSARD who meets a simple rose sales woman from the Czech Republic Marketa Irglova on the streets of Dublin Ireland...both struggle'n musicians who decide to make the most simply beautiful and sublime musical soundtrack of their lives together that i've ever heard which incidentally can pull at the strings of the most criminal hardened heart (very much like my own) AN ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY MUST SEE!

though after 100's of view'ns and a few trips to the tidy bowl from choke'n

on too much cabbage every St Patty's (i know where you thought i was goin with that ya lil horny leprechaun) i decided to expand my horizons and give ya a lil more meat fer yer potatoes...so here's a list of my new top 10 fav-o-rit irish flicks to cuddle up to on the couch with yer lord or lil Lourdes Marie Veronica Ciccone Leon of the dance 

(click here fer my Spotify mix to get yer irish jig on)

first up is the irish thriller that came out in 1992 and caused an absolute

uproar with audiences (especially straight men) in the theaters around the globe "THE CRYING GAME" starr'n STEVEN RHEA (Fergus) and MIRANDA RICHARDSON (Jude) as members of the IRA from northern ireland who kidnap british solider and cricket player FORREST WHITTAKER (Jody) fer their political purposes...though Fergus ends up build'n a bond with Jody while in captivity and promises to take care of Jody's lover Dil played by breakout star JAYE DAVIDSON and the pivotal twist most of the audience DID NOT see come'n

and was accompanied by the break-out title song of the same name performed by BOY GEORGE

next up is a wee bit lighter and alot more of a light hearted indie flick filled 

with laughter that came out in 1998 "WAKING NED DEVINE" revolves around 2 best elderly mates played by IAN BANNEN (Jackie O'Shea) and DAVID KELLY (Michael O'Sullivan) who discover some lucky bastard in their teeny tiny town of 52 has won the irish national lottery and invite the entire town over fer a chicken dinner to weed out the winner only to find out that one villager never showed up...the reclusive NED DEVINE played by JIMMY KEOGH

doin quadruple duty as writer...producer...director and starr'n in hot to trot 

tittalator ED BURNS 1995 indie flick won best picture at Sundance that same year "THE BROTHERS MCMULLEN" revolves around 3 irish catholic brothers from Long Island who clash over their views on sex...religion...marriage and family while pound'n down a few beers and the occasional hot pocket on the side

of course no irish catholic movie would be complete without some head 

master at an all boys irish catholic reformatory school prove'n his massive sadistic power over the school boys until newly hired teacher AIDAN QUINN steps in to set things straight with the blimey basturd...based on true events from 1939 durin' the brink of  WWII that came out in 2003 "SONG FOR A RAGGY BOY" is a definite disturber

since everyday can't be full of pink hearts...yellow moon...orange stars...

green clovers and blue diamonds...let's dive even deeper into the "based on true events" genre that same year with my next rivet'n flick starr'n aussie beauty CATE BLANCHETT as irish crime journalist "VERONICA GUERIN" who's try'n to uncover and expose the drug lords and their illegal drug trade that's ruin'n the lives of the work'n class families especially the children in Dublin, Ireland in the mid 90's until her investigations turn her into a target

 

we all have had those friends that we eventually grow weary of over time 

and no longer have anything worth while to chat about anymore and just want to be left to yer own miserable existence before yer time expires and no film has captured the true mean'n of "just leave me the fuck alone" better than "THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN" from 2022 starr'n Dublin's own dastardly duo COLIN FARRELL and BRENDAN GLEESON as former besties live'n on the desolate fictional irish isle of Inisherin which both were nominated fer an oscar fer their beyond brilliant performance

if you ever wondered about the true irish life but don't wanna deal with all 

that cabbage bloat'n and potato starches...why not check out "THE QUIET GIRL" from 2022 about 9 year old CAIT who grows up durin' the early 1980's in a dysfunctionally neglectful irish family who goes to live with her much older distant cousin and her hubs (in theaters now)

though i consider myself a documentary whore at heart...there has been 

very few docs lately that have captured my full attention til i end up try'na stick toothpicks in my toenails and a blender in my bathtub fer even beginn'n to watch it in the first place except fer "NOTHING COMPARES" FROM 2022 about irish songbird skinhead beauty of the late 80's & 90's SINEAD O'CONNOR who made PRINCE's "NOTHING COMPARES 2 U" the #1 song thru-out the planet in 1990...SINEAD would risk her rise'n fame and fortune fer the truth about the catholick church though unfortunately was thrown to the media wolves and exiled from the music industry fer her outspokenness until she was vindicated fer her actions 20+ years later in this amaze'n legend's documentary

another irish documentary just as powerful and poignant released in 2015

"THE QUEEN OF IRELAND" follows RORY O'NEILL better known to most of Ireland as the outspoken gay rights activist and the country's most famous perform'n illusionist PANTI BLISS which follows PANTI and her tireless activism on the referendum fer marriage equality involve'n same sex couples...which also was the highest gross'n doc ever in Ireland at the time

and last but certainly not the least in the slightest stars the beyond brilliant

irish bloke CILLIAN MURPHY in this 2005 dramedy "BREAKFAST ON PLUTO" which fits perfect in today's climate though takes place in the 1970's in the fictional irish town of Tyrellin...MURPHY plays the abandoned transgendered KITTEN placed in a foster family who desperately searches fer her birth mother whom she is convinced is an actress live'n in London and sets out to find her after a run-in with her temporary boyfriend in a band who is work'n fer the IRA

there ya have it kittens...hope i helped ya out with a few fav suggestions

of mine...now kiss my clovers and GET OFF MY DRESS!