eat me i'm a danish!

SEX...is all around us…we are bombarded 24/7 from sunrise to sunset

from morn’n wood

to gett’n as moist as a betty crocker cake down there

you can’t escape it…no matter how HARD you try!

it’s on all our NEED-2-KNOW-NOW nightly news programs

by the check-out counter at yer fav-o-rit non denominational grocier

our schools have become the epicenter of sexually confused battlefields

from the locker room...

to the library

i heard they’re even passing out condoms to kindergarteners these days

even the simplest nursery rhymes taught us about it at an early age

rub-a-dub-dub…3 men in a tub

(menage a toi’s were socially acceptable and encouraged even back then)


little bo peep…"lost her sheep"

(ya right...they're clearly talk'n about devirginalization here…who knew?)

little miss muffet...blah blah blah...then along came a spider

(looks like missy fergot to add spemicidal jams and jellies to the area)

from goo-goo...

to GaGa

from the playground...

to the priesthood

from KD Lang...

to Katy Perry

from Crystal Gayle...

to Krystal Kleer

from Bettie Page...

to Betty White

from Elvis’s hips...

to Jagger’s lips

from a half breed...

to a half twat

from a BOY who looked like a gurl...

to a girl who now is a boi

from an artist formerly known as annoying...

to a former artist that just became annoying

it can be used by one Miss Stone...

or it could just get you dethroned

it’s animal instinct...

it’ll make you think

it's can be absolutely fabulous

or an absolute mess

it’s there for you to enjoy how you want

with a girl

(not endorse’n necrophilia…this is just an iconic image of sexy to me)

or a boy

(jesus...call me...i'm available)

just make 100% sure...you know what yer doin and what you want...
or get off my dress!