things were gett’n a lil serious the last couple of blogs…so time to lighten things up…and i can’t think of a more fitt’n and proper blog than dedicate’n today (even though it’s actually tomorrow technically)
to the woman who turned underwear into outerwear…
causing millions of women to add vagisil to their water cooler conversations
make’n pre and post pubescent str8 and not so str8 boys
cross’n “borderlines” fer the past 30 years...
tell’n us to “don’t just stand there…
let’s get to it…
strike a pose…
there’s nothing to it!"
once asked by Dick Clark in 1984
what she wanted to do with the rest of her career…
she said she wanted to “RULE THE WORLD!’
and she has…
as the GUINESS BOOK of WORLD RECORDS top female recording artist
of all time…
sell’n more than 300 millions records world wide…
beat'n out Elvis as the artist with the most top-ten hits…
she has mastered her music video imagery with provacation and artfulness like no other artist
"EXPRESS YOURSELF"
at the time it was made...was the most expensive video play'n on Mtv at the cost of 1 million smax
she’s sold out stadiums with world tours from Chattanooga to China
gave many memorable performances at the Mtv award shows
with her breakout performance in “DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN”…
as Susan
she has appeared in countless other movies include’n...
“WHO’S THAT GIRL?”
as Nicky Finn
”DICK TRACY”
as Breathless Mahoney
”A LEAGUE of THEIR OWN”
as Mae Mordabito
”SWEPT AWAY”
as Amber Leighton
and won a golden globe for her portrayal in “EVITA”
as Eva Peron
just to name a few
is an author with a #1 best seller children’s book “THE ENGLISH ROSES”…
which became the fastest-selling children's picture book of all time and the release of 15 other children’s books that have gone on to sell millions thru-out the world.
MADONNA LOUISE VERONICA CICCONE was born august 16th 1958 in Bay City Michigan
her dad is Silvio Anthony Ciccone and her mother…whom she was named after…Madonna Louise Fortin
died in 1963 of breast cancer at the age of 30.
Silvio would get remarried to his house keeper Joan Gustafson
Her siblings Martin, Anthony, Paula, Christopher and Melanie
are from Madonna's mother...Jennifer and Mario are from Joan
she studied to be a ballet dancer
but soon dropped out and moved to new york in 1977
where she met her boyfriend Dan Gilroy and formed the “THE BREAKFAST CLUB”
not to be confused with this BREAKFAST CLUB (which came years later)
playing guitar…drums and singer
in 1980 she left the band and formed “EMMY”
with then boyfriend Stephen Bray
by 1982 Madonna decided to be a solo artist and signed a deal with SIRE records and released her first single “EVERYBODY” on october 6
which became a dance floor hit…and the hits haven’t stopped since.
photographs she had taken in the nude as an art model
to make ends meet for only $25 years early…
would be published once Madonna had gained star status and were sold
to Playboy
and to Penthouse…
but she brushed off the controversy and was unapologetic and by 1990..released her own artistic nudes shot by famed photographer Steven Meisel for her book called SEX
which sold millions worldwide.
she has endorsed numerous products...but PEPSI lost 5 million to her
after backing out on her "BLONDE AMBITION TOUR" in 1991
because of religious knob heads want'n her banned
due to her "like a prayer" video and it's imagery
while film’n her video for “material girl”...
she met Sean Penn
and they married months later in 1985 on her birthday but the marriage would last only 4 years and they divorced september 14, 1989
it would be another 11 years before she would marry again to british director Guy Ritchie
on december 22, 2000 in Scotland…but unfortunately they divorced in december of 2008
Madonna has 4 children…Lourdes Marie Leon was born october 14, 1996
her father is Madonna’s ex personal trainer Carlos Leon.
her son Rocco Ritchie was born august 11, 2000
his dad is Guy Ritchie.
David Banda Mwale was adopted on october 10, 2006…and Chifundo “Mercy” James was adopted on June 12, 2009 both from Malawi, Africa
she's been a brunette
she's been a red head
she's been a brassy brown
she's been a bottle blonde
she's been a platinum blonde
she's even been 2 toned
she's had long hair
she's had short hair
she's had kinky curly hair
she's had stick straight hair
she's even had wavey hair
she's done the feathered
she's done the fro
she's even modeled for this mo'
she knows how to pull off a top hat
or forget to button her top half
she's posed with an elephant
then there was that horse
and even the teeniest tiniest of course
here she is pull'n a pig
her she is in a short black wig
she once was seen with a clown
and another time lay'n down in a brown gown
on a roof top she once sat
she's even worn a crazy hat
she used to date a man named Jesus
and brought the crowd down to their kneesiz
she's caused some controversy with the cross
but everyone knows that she's the boss
here she is in the water
and eat'n chains that cost more than a quarter
here she is doin' some work
her she is look'n biserk
squeeze'n a sponge into a bucket
where'n what ya want...and say'n awww fuck it!
she can pull off a boa...with the greatest of ease
or wear a bouffant...with a lot of tease
sometimes she needs to just lay down
sometimes she does it in a gown
she hides behind no ones mask
except one time...for that was the task
she can hold herself up by her own 2 breasts
and never lets her boobs feel like they're oppressed
she's played some chess with a dog
and even was fondled by this old frog
sometimes she'll sit in a chair
or on the floor in just underwear
she's smoke'n hot when take'n a rest
or smoke'n hot in a black leather vest
from the borderlines
to the beaches
she's always in fashion
even when gawked by these leeches
she has influenced millions thru-out her career with her kaleidoscopicstyle
the 'rebel without a clause in her contract" look
the "post punk pop rocks' look
the "like a virgin touched for the 17th time on a beach" look
the "fine...i'll wear the stupid black hat but i'm keep'n the wilson leather gloves" look
the "being bitch slapped by the hand of hindu" look
the "flo's comin to town" look
the "i have so much money...my money has money" look
the "effective crotch grabb'n...in polka dots" look
the "post modern peek-a-boob hippe blouse" look
the "you cursed brat...look what you've done...i'm melting...melting...oh what a world...what a world" black taffeta gaultier gown look (big hit in malaysia)
the "ancient chinese secret with elongated mud flaps" look
the "i'm not a lesbian"...lesbian look
the "salmon swimsuit and pink satin capri's with blood clot belt now at old gravey" look
the "i'm not a powerful lesbian"...powerful lesbian look
the "hysterectomy panties in heels" look
the "gimme a bunch of crap to cover the scars on my arm" look
the "i'm sad cuz no one wants to see my boobs in another video" video look
the "yea...you'll be kiss'n my ass someday very soon" look
the "i'm clipp'n my toe nails...get the fuck outta here" look
the "drag queen in a burka" look
the "MISS IMODIUM A-D 2007" look
her music
and her many humanitarian efforts
but she herself was also influenced by many…most notably Marilyn Monroe…
but other artists like Karen Carpenter
Nancy Sinatra
The Supremes
to name a few.
Rolling Stone magazine said “Madonna remains one of the greatest pop acts of all time". and the most successful female recording artist of all time”
on march 10, 2008…Madonna was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
Madonna made her directorial debut in “FILTH and WISDOM”
which tells the story about a Ukrainian immigrant who finances his dreams of rock glory by moonlighting as a cross-dressing dominatrix and his two female flatmates…a ballet dancer who works as a stripper and pole-dancer at a local club and a pharmacy assistant who dreams of going to Africa to help starving children.
Her latest directorial film W.E.
is the story of two fragile but determined women separated by more than six decades… lonely New Yorker Winthrop is obsessed with what she perceives as the ultimate love story: King Edward’s VIII’s abdication of the British throne for the woman he loved, American divorcee Wallis Simpson
Madonna has filmed 3 documentaries…”TRUTH or DARE”…released in 1991…
gives an amaze’n look at life on and off stage for a mega superstar
”I’M GOING TO TELL YOU A SECRET” is the follow-up 15 years later
and shows how live'n a life as a mega pop star...wife and mother can take it's toll
“I AM BECAUSE WE ARE” was released in 2008
chronicles the concern over the millions of orphans in the African country of Malawi who have lost parents and siblings to HIV and AIDS…many of whom live on the streets.
some think i'm obsessed
and some think i'm crazy
but there's one thing fer sure
she sure as shit is not lazy
Madonna started with a small dream...
and turned it into a dream come true
i don't know what to say about MADONNA
that will give you a sense of how much she's influenced me
to be the beauty with BALLS
and i'm not sure i've said enough about this woman
so i'll just say thanx for all the joy and inspiration you've given me
and kick'n some serious ass fer the past 30 years
and pleez don't ever stop
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE QUEEN!
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