Monday, May 18, 2020

GAME OVER!

have you?...wait i mean...would you?...no wait!...could you ever watch
the remake of PYSCHO and not say to yerself...
WHAT THE FUCK is with this pile of refried shit on bisexual bread all about anyways?

i mean...i totally get the whole try'na come'n up with an interest'n plot to be
in the runn'n fer a hollyweird oscar that will try and captivate the audience fer more than 30 seconds before they try to discretely log into their pornhub account with their earplugs in to watch the latest ball bust'n dick flick while they try and shove their science project sausage thru the bottom of the popcorn bucket so their date can jack them off...seriously though...let's face it...even that role plays been over played...
nothin's original anymore!

so we all remember that twisted time back in 2017 when i acquired my 
very 1st official stalker as thee unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of my own universe...on whatever app i was on at the time...and oh what a proud day THAT was...
i knew i had FINALLY made it after all as someone's personal life alter'n love slave...that fortunately i had quickly defused before i would end up as some sordid lifetime movie of the week...
played by the age'n beautifully...Meridith Baxter Birney!

so there i was on break from paint'n the shutters on my neice's and my
fav-o-rit dream home...at some meth riddled under priviledged park in Oakdale, MN...when i decided to log online and chatter away with some of the locals in the area to get a recipe fer somethin' that would freeze beautifully fer the church's annual anti social social gather'n that weekend
 BUTT unfortunately...

to be quiet honest...my batt'n average was batt'n below average hits from 
anyone within a 10 trailer radius that actaully owned a full set of choppers that didn't cook anything besides blue ice...ya know what i mean?

then all of a sudden...a not so white knight popped up on my screen
so i thought i'd indulge in a lil friendly convo...why not!...he owned all his own teeth after all

break would end and soon enough it was time to get back to Pablo 
Picasso'n the shutters on my neices trailer...a mere 4 hours later and 3 back tranquilizers...cuz i was walk'n like a himaylan shot putter...i was wrapp'n up my day and headed back to my shit box in the Minne-Apple when i recieved a message from my potential freezes beautifully anti-social socializer

by the time i had returned home that even'n...i stripped outta my striped
culottes...lathered my face with a generous supply of St Ive's mint julip mud mask to help rejuvenate my soft yet supple skin and continued on with a mini marathon of season 2 from my new fav-o-rit drug on Netflix before count'n sheep that even'n

by morn'n it was time to rinse and repeat it all over again in Oakdale...
Toulouse Letrec’n my A-double snakes under the hot midwestern sun...dressed like a tusken raider from Tucsan as not to sizzle my creamy white flesh cuz i just can’t afford the age spots

night fall would eventually come...since i wasn't...so i decided to log online
while watch'n another mini marathon of DEAD TO ME and check my mail...turns out GAMEOVER had left me a mini message...awwww...wasn’t that “Nice”?

at that very moment i had just cracked open my fortune cookie that read somethin' like "he with little response...is just as little as every where else" & unfortunately he wasn't quite finished feed'n me with his setiment... 
hmmm...
did i miss somethin?

at first i was like...well...maybe he's just try'na psyche me out or somethin' cuz i can take it as much as i can give it at times...then outta no where...
i didn't know whether to fry him up a back hand sammich or...
consult my balls fer answers?
 all i knew was...AVA MAX would be the theme to our now unfortunate anthem i would only remember him by

normally at this point i'da just called out the spirits and block his sorry
dilapidated ass...but i seriously had no clue where his birage of bullshit came from...plus i wanted that "freezes beautifully" recipe...i thought...you know what...this could'a been THE ONE that maybe someday we would buy a trailer park of our very own 
and adopted a few miniature mongolian warthogs of our very own 
(well cuz i had my tubes tied since i was unable to bare any of my very own)

needless to say...after smooth'n out the corns on my very petite feet and
remove'n my soul...along with my mud mask...i slipped into my Holly Hobby even'n gown...pulled the curlers outta my basement bush and figered this GAME was truly OVER before it ever had a chance to begin...eh...i'll survive...now GET OFF MY DRESS!

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