to make bunny soup...just to get yer utter dismay across...without the other person mince'n yer words into some sorta deciphered dilemma'd ambrosia salad
and trust me when i say...i thought i would neva eva say this...however...
as much as Bunny didn't enjoy mandarin food...nor a mandarin grand baby when she found out Charlotte was goin all intro vitro on her dilapidated ass...i got her point!
as much as i don't enjoy listen'n to raygay music on a caribbean cruise (cuz this is what happens when ya order a deeply discounted cruise vacation on one of those judgmentally judied non heterosexual hook up sites) i also don’t enjoy bein’ abandoned on a deserted caribbean island with a bunch of cock hungry gays try’na catch some rays...due to my abandonment issues
F-I-N-A-L-L-Y after 4 looong ass years...M will be release'n her much
anticipated 14th studio album "MADAME X" appropriately on june 14th...
though really...it’s her 16th studio album...i don't know why they never include "DICK TRACY" & "EVITA" soundtracks...it’s all M...she recorded em in a studio...& not in some cardboard refrigerator box in some back alley on skid row in LA fer fucks sake
which is incidentally my other god's bday...BOY G
(yes...apparently that's the hip thing to do these days...drop every letter after the 1st in yer name)
return'n back to her roots...literally...i was ecstatic...at least...about
the cover art with the obviously possible influences of mexicano artiste Frida Kahlo...Dee Sniders "STRANGERLAND" and civil rights american muslin mover and shaker Malcolm X...i was ALL on board...i get it...M's a majestic artiste...M's a freedom fighter...M will not be silenced!
then...yer single dropped!
that'd make the neighbors call the cops cuz you played it on repeat fer 8 straight fuck'n hours...while they were try'na enjoy their day off explore'n their "cushioned caves" with the mail man...this was to be thee song fer open'n season of the QUEEN M...that will most likely kick off the summer season of anthems by her (like years past) with press junkets and the occasional tacky talk show performance to keep the fans die'n...til her tour starts later this year...
BUTT instead...
i mean...i know Lynn never promised me a rose garden...but at least she was consistently sing'n about new fresh ways she could fuck you over! (and this was even after perform'n a quick car concert on repeat with my windows rolled down...along the highway at a moderately safe pace of 65 mph)
sadly...after patiently wait'n fer 4 years fer somethin' fresh & ear popp'n
i litterally was like...HMMM...now where in the sam hell did i put that double cd set of the late great LYNN ANDERSON's greatest hits?
and i'm sorry to get all Glenn Close on yer supple and awfully mighty high
alabastered A-double snakes at this point in the game...but i gotta get it out!
bein a life long die hard fan...ever since you told us way back in 1983
"EVERYBODY...get up and do your thing"...i annoyed the live'n fuck outta my sibs...each and every time when you premiered yer latest and greatest beyond brilliant music video at the top of every hour on MTV
when MTV was actually still a music channel that only played ONLY music video's
i've stuck with you and thoroughly enjoyed yer cross controversies
hey...ain't nutt'n wrong with a sinn'n saint...is there?
BUTT....M...
when i heard yer lead single "MEDELLIN" fer the very 1st time...as i was sweat'n my alabastered A-double snakes off from my work-out...i was hunt'n all over my car fer some dramamine...a pillow...and a paint by number of the cd cover....cuz this did not say to me...
"EVERYBODY...get up and do your thing"...no it did not!
it was more like a song you would hear once the staff had served you yer lime jell-O portion...after you've finished play'n yer 20th game of canasta with the other colostomy bags at Shady Pines...and you needed to get in a lil cardio
Notre Dame may have been on fire...
Notre Dame may have been on fire...
but this single was not...FER ME!
wait a minute...that was maybe a wee bit insensitive...was that too soon?
whew...thanx M...glad you TOTALLY agree with me
lemme break down the lyrical sense that just seemed to make no sense
to start...that open'n line "one two...one two...one two cha-cha-cha"...it's like you were play'n hop scotch'n with yer finger tips and yer black platinum Am Ex card...at some random vend'n machine in Lisbon...try'n to decide what Portuguese child you wanted to purchase...while David was at soccer practice
then we ended up hear'n way more of Maluma's columbian spicy voice...than we did of yers...ya might as well been market'n it as "Maluma (feature'n Madonna)"...i'm mean fer real..i wouldn't be mad at that...
yer always will'n to help out the flailing careers of many from PRINCE to RICKY MARTIN and MR KANKERSOREDASHIAN to name a few
"MEDELLIN" makes "SPANISH LESSONS" sound like a #1 grammy award winner
this song just didn't do it fer me...like every one of yer other leads off of every one of yer albums you've give'n us since the very the beginn'n...
we were all "LIVING FOR LOVE"
we ja-dored that you "HUNG UP"on us
but where's the "MUSIC"?
this...as a lead...frankly lacked that la-da-da that most of us expected
and by us...I MEAN MEEEEE...though i'm sure it'll grow on me...
like some beautiful fungus...once i hear the 1000 dance remixes by every available dj die'n to remix it fer the dance floor...cuz i have zero plans of ever abandone'n you M...
just let me make this KRYSTAL KLEER right here!
help feed yer kids over the years...oh look...i found my fav one
and i'm completely positive...that M picked this patch up at the Sotherby's auction
of the late great Pete Burns left over memorabilia from a couple years back...though i'm sure he's spinn'n around like a record that someone's gett'n some use outta it at least
i'm still gonna camp out over nite so i can be the 1st one to purchase yer album...when Circuit City opens up...after all that i've invested into you to...
in conclusion...i wanna end this review on a completely positive note...
now get off my dress!
****UPDATE***
the video just premiered...and now it all makes sense to me
though i'm still stick'n to the fact that this is not the strongest album opener...but watch it here and revel in her alabastered self!
****UPDATE***
the video just premiered...and now it all makes sense to me
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