brilliantly hysterical hysterectomy hilarities of one MISS KATHY FUCK'N GRIFFIN (F-I-N-A-L-L-Y!) this june 26th @ her SOLD THE FUCK OUT SHOW in under 24 hrs @ Carnegie hall in the Big Apple...i of course will be gett'n devirginized..via the Carnegie...fer the very 1st time (and trust me...it's been years since i can say that without bust'n out laugh'n)...but there's plenty of opportunities to catch her at other selected dates around the country and scattered across the border...
SO CLICK THE FUCK RIGHT HERE ALREADY FER TIX FER FUCKS SAKE!
those boxes of wine fer Maggie ain't gonna pay fer themselves!
ps...this is a non paid endorsement...but since i wasted...like a perfectly good regrettable SCRUFF hook up...(true story) MISS K YOU OWE ME BIG fer this!...perhaps you can possibly hook me up with one of yer trained lonely monkeys when i cum to town (insert wink wink here) i'm just say'n...can ya help an unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of my own universe out pleez? cuz i'm have'n one helluva time try'n a find a reasonably rated roach motel to lay my supple and oh so plump A double snakes on that won't break my piggy bank
BUTT lets back it up a bit...shall we kittens?
i have been O-B-S-E-S-S-E-D with this sassy lil firecracker ever since...
her epic on screen debut as one of MEDUSA's backup dancer's...who was told not to go complain'n to a lawyer about accept'n a pay cut...cuz of the yen conversion rate...in the equally epic non academy award winn'n film "DARE TO BE TRUTHFUL"
but MISS K really broke out as a woman to be reckoned with...play'n VICKI GROENER...co-worker to that Gloria Vanderbilt jeans model chick (whatever her name is from the 80's) in the 90's...on the hit show "SUDDENLY SUSAN"...that i'm still wait'n patiently to purchase on dvd so i got some quality tv to reminisce on while they're serve'n me jell-o in the home 3 times a day
of course who can ferget her emmy award winn'n reality show "MY LIFE ON THE D-LIST"...
hold'n the guinness book of world records with thee most tv nominated stand up specials by a woman...
thee best new years hostess with the mostess...by far...(that's NOT an opinion...that's A FACT JACK!) on CNN...with endless tours around the globe fer eons...ALL ON HER VERY OWN terms without the help from the Weinstein's of the world...THAT IS....
until it came to an unwarranted shit storm from our mentally deranged piece of pig shit #45 currently disgrace'n the oval orifice and use'n the constitution as his own personal ass wipe...along with his band of pied piper brain dead lobotomized CASPER crusaders that decided to put a hollyweird hit out on her career...ALL BECUZ OF HER 1ST AMENDMENT RIGHT as a genius comedienne...dripp'n in A-1 barbecue sauce
and to add high choleric salt to the already hemorrhage'n wound known has her livelihood...pig shit #45 used the power of the white house...FAUX SNOOZE and his alt right dipshits by putt'n her on a no fly list and detained from airport to airport
well...MISS K is back with a vengeance with her beyond brilliant portrayal of helter skeletor Kelly Anne Conned-Her-Way-In on Comedy Centrals "PRESIDENT'S SHOW"
you know the one i'm talk'n about....that cracked out scarecrow and spokes model fer that horrible horrible tragedy...don'tcha remember?
and she is done zipp'n her lip and apologize'n to ALL the haters and skaters from her illustrious career...and i fer one can't wait to ride this wave...so get yer tix to see MISS K in her "LAUGH YOUR HEAD OFF" world tour today...cuz they're sell'n faster than the press secretary Sanders spins at her press brief'ns
and get off my dress!
oh yea...before i go...side note...
though it's already a #1 best seller on our pig shit #45's arch nemesis's website...order yer copy today...urine fer a treat!
and go see KATHY!...why not!