Monday, October 31, 2016

unique freaks

well..it's happened again kittens...one of the greats from my angst riddled...
youth recently collected his glittered wings to that fabooshka disco party in the great beyond...where ever that is...which was an actual shock as i was try'na land an interview with him a while back

so recently...i was accused by some new kitten fucktard...who apparently has the I.Q. of  STD riddled slug...that lives on the corner of no-sense-of-humor lane and go-fuck-yerself drive...who tracked me down thru my
hashtag #FUCKTRUMP somehow and noticed i was an accomplished internationally known blog informant...inform'n me...
my blog don't make no sense to her!

listen here kittens...i will only write this once...10 more times...
i did not chose to write fer the uneducated kittens out there...i was chose'n...i write fer the lowest common denominators and Wal-Mart beauty queens to understand...
if an unfortunate chunk of this great country of deplorable's can vote in the dark side as their leader...that will inevitably lead them down the path of destruction and despair...
then my write'n style ain't far behind...if it's really that HARD to understand...then GET OFF MY DRESS!

i'm not afraid to get my Barbara Wawa blouse dirty if need be...
i'll ask the tough ?'s and bring you the sordid stories i believe that need to be told...
and i will cut the fame shit out that goes along with bein' the unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of my own universe that i now am...just to get you the answers that i feel are the most important popular...by me

i'm all about educate'n the masses...who'll sit on their asses...
who have a HARD time try'na figer out those HARD to find situations

but i ain't gonna waste my time with this dick...cuz i'd rather talk about somethin' waaay more perverse...WHY NOT!

i'm talk'n specifically about non vaginal pipeage!
everyone from boys to men...and monkeys to masterpieces

we just can't seem to get ENOUGH of the male persuasion

they come in ALL shapes and sizes :

from the pretty 



somehow though...HOLLYWOOD...unfortunately...is NOT in the business
of show'n us enough wood...unless you go to one of those back alley movie theaters...with a  roll of quarters 

though the paps have made it the latest OBSESSION...




and luckily the few...the proud...show it out loud...


the pricks are FINALLY gett'n the spotlight that they deserve...
instead of being shunned to look like a perv!

let's give it up to the one eyed pirate....
that have to work so HARD...
with the battle of the bulge


get off my dress!

Monday, October 24, 2016

trick or treason

this is my all time fav-o-rit time of year...wake'n up to the crisp clean air...
walk'n thru a kaleidoscope of fall'n foliage in the forest...
a classroom full of miniature spermicidal maniacs...
til you settle down fer the nite...drink'n dran-o shots and stick'n toothpicks in yer toennails wait'n in a-n-t-i-c-i-p-a-t-i-o-n for the death of yet another cult classic bein' ripped to shitty shreds on tv...i just even can't...all i can say is kittens...don't dream it...just fa-get-aboud-it! seriously

but the biggest shit show this hallowed season HAS NOT been about

no...the scariest part of this entire electoral process has been between...

listen here kittens...trust me...much like i believe that MADONNA is the 
and that certain stalkers body areas should be functional and not funky when visit'n thee unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of my own universe at Chateau Fever
i also believe it is YER RIGHT TO VOTE as a gas guzzle'n...self centered...monochromatic patriarch with a splash of neurosis on the side...i am not here to take that away from you...
BUTT...

if you believe the leader of the this great nation of ours...as you well know
(let's get real kittens...that was stolen) believes he should get a pass about bragg'n about "locker room antics"
believes in mock'n the armed services
and believes in plant'n the possibilities...
then by all means...you are far more superior deplorable than the rest of yer country fellowman

then...by all means...drag yer knuckles to the vote'n both on nov 28th
and don't fergit to take the dishes outta the sink before ya pee in it!
 and don't worry if you vote the wrong way kittens...i won't disown you or block yer wretched A double snakes from FB or any other social media fer that matter...i will just flush you...much like you have with yer morals and human decency...down the drain...leave you outta my collection of Cher Boy George and Cyndi Lauper dolls...and cross you off my non existent christmas card list that you were never on in the first place when it was existent!

now get off my dress!