Monday, March 21, 2016

MAC ATTACK!

i'm sure the universe knows the importance of the MAC...
in our current cultural history...take fer instance...that sappy nursery rhyme sing-a-long song about Old Mac Donald who had a farm...loved by millions of little kittens around the globe...til they find out why he "had a farm"...it's cuz the damn bank repossessed the land fer default'n on his loan after Old Miss Donald burnt the damn barn to the ground one nite after catch'n him fornicate'n with the farm animals

then there's MAC-n-cheese...a simple yet a very much deserved delicacy
fer all those burned out biology majors and majorettes cramp'n til the wee hours of the morn'n...only to realize after 4 years of hard studies...their useless degree ends up just as some pretty useless plaque on their studio apartment wall cuz they'll end up doin hard labor at the damn factory itself

of course no conscious queen would be complete in the burn'n spotlight...
without the schlack of MAC cosmetics molest'n their mugshot...dime store queens in train'n heels take notice...you can save yer hard earned tips spend'n hours layer'n on yer maybelline but you still end up look'n like some washed out water colored crack wreck on stage

so thanx to my magically delicious friend and mayor of desperadoville...
Timbellina...fer generously give'n me tickets that both he & i could afford (well cuz they were free) not to one but both nites and introduce'n me to thee biggest MAC surprise of them all...(well since that MAC i met last weekend...but no worries kittens...i failed my EPT test...so save that 3 layered diaper cake...fer now)...the self described Elizabethan fool and collagist known as TAYLOR MAC at the Guthrie theater this past weekend in Minneapolis
my crazy kween of the kitty litter...Poonanie...came with the 2nd nite...and we were over the moon with Timbellina's "over the moon" martini's...we both ended up turn'n into a puddle before the clock struck 12...and not only did me and the Poon loose her glass slipper...she lost her mind...along with her liver on the dance floor...but today isn't about her...
now...where was i?...oh yes...
described as a cross between Tiny Tim and Ziggy Stardust by wikipedia
i would best describe TAYLOR MAC as the bastard child party monster performance anti establishmentally brilliant arteest of Leigh Bowery and Nina Hagen
either case...TAYLOR MAC hypothetically blew me away with his incestuously operatic voice...his look and of course his heels...that i'da killed for in a fuchsia or obersheen...but he was soo soo much more than that...his show "A 24 DECADE HISTORY OF POPULAR MUSIC: THE 20TH CENTURY ABRIDGED" consisted of songs thru-out history and the story behind them
as a playwright/singer/songwriter/actor/performance artist/director/producer and all around downtown legend in the BIG APPLE...TAYLOR MAC has toured the globe from the Lincoln Center to the Sydney Opera House and everywhere in between 
though he apparently pissed off Mr. & Mrs. Colostomy bag sitt'n in front of me on the 1st nite...cuz after his open'n speech about how we...as the pay'n audience (or non pay'n audience member in my case...well only cuz i'm thee unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of my own universe) could dispense with the grandular applause fer the 1% who made this theater production possible...they decided it wasn't worth leave'n their limed jell-o heaven on the communal table tray after all and decided to enjoy their metamucil martini and Matlock marathon back at their palatial raisin ranch of piss stains and parade of swarovski tchotchkee's

though the show came to a close this past weekend in Minneapolis...
you still have a chance to catch TAYLOR MAC by gett'n tickets 
before he embarks on his most ambitious project to date..."A 24 DECADE OF POPULAR MUSIC" a 24 hour long concert spann'n 240 years in music...which is in the works fer later this october in the BIG APPLE...you'd be an absolute fool not to go...seriously

oh...and on top of ALL of that...he's one hot MAC outta his MAC...
that i wouldn't have a prob mac'n on...if he'd ask...and of course if i wasn't busy

now get off my dress!

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