Monday, April 10, 2017

blind man's bluff

so i was gonna start off this highly journalistic inquisitional
masterpiece report with as many biggley words that i could ever make thee most biggelyist word salad i could never explain to make it make any sorta damn sense to my many kittens thru-out the unisvere and to what was the real reason behind the reason our TWITTER BITCH in cheap red ties...just wants to be basically seen as...and that is as thee most presidentialist prom queen in the history of presidents...but we all know how it ended fer Carrie's classmates
all to try and pull off some sorta mental magic trick
ummm...HELL to the NO...we're not lett'n Putin's A double snake hole off that easy...especially if the QUEEN BEE has anything to say about it

as i was about to get down to the nitty gritty of this whole sharade parade
i was distracted by another hard hitt'n break'n news story...that was unfold'n in front of my very eyes...oops...i meant the one below
(hey i gotta give some sugar to keep ya come'n back each week...right?)
so from what i could gather...just as i barely adjusted my smooth impeccably plump A double snakes into my local libraries A double snake holder on wheels...
flipp'n on youtube and switch'n on my think'n cap with a lil Russian Red...why not! 
BUUUUUUTT anyways...where was i?...oh yes...
these 2 obvious fans stalkers in back of me...started fight'n fer my affection attention by bitch slapp'n each other to death...and trust me...this had nutt'n to do with exchange'n ambrosia recipes and whether or not mini colored marshmallows should or should not be allowed
though i missed the beginn'n of all this dramarama...(dammit all the H-E-double hockey stix...i wished i had my emergency hot plate & jiffy pop in my purse)
subject A...all of a sudden blurts out "hey...i'm just express'n my gayness" fer reals that was his direct quote
like he was audition'n to be Barry Man-in-my-Hole's fluffer or somethin'
(ps...another side note...last week...REALLY?...AS IF!...of course that means the PC parade will flock to Vegas to see his shows fer the next 2-3 it was a good financial move on his part)
anywhozillding! the much younger subject B was all "bitch want that gay my dad...get outta my face...okaaaay!"
though i was tempted to toss in my 2 cents and ask'n him fer his dad's number...i was cock blocked by a non cock...try'na handle the situation the best she could...NOW...i ain't try'na judge or anything...i'm just say'n...
she was come'n off more like Office Laverne Hooks from the Police Academy flicks...once she got off her high chair
a few more escalate'n words and bitch slapp's were tossed about...back and forth...until the police were finally called and Hooks has the situatioin under her control
finally the shit storm began to calm down and they both just grew a few balls fast and went their separate ways
SHIT! there goes my complimentary strip search...oh well...there's always hope later on tonite 
so basically what the moral if this whole shit show was about kittens...WAAAAS...don't be fooled by the shiny object that our Lord Twitter Bitch is dangle'n in front of you...
listen up kittens...we've already seen this clown show once before...remember?...and most us with a function'n brain didn't buy it then
now get off my dress!

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