let me start by say'n...poor...poor...poor Shelley B!
i hope it had nothing to do with my last weeks prediction that might have swayed those corn whackers minds into lett'n this coocoo c*nt fly the coop!
the only crazy batshit that people wanna see this year is on the big screen
yer a "critic"...i'm a "critic"...we're ALL "critics" at some point durin' any part of any given day...whether it's what movie ya wanna see on date nite...what people are wear'n that could be considered hazzardous to yer cornea...
what broadway production has captured yer attention for an expensive nap...or in some cases...what is considered sexual perversions of nature!
basically...critic is the politically correct equivelant to a bitch session
some people have turned their bitch sessions into bank accounts
you have yer famous movie bitches from the 80's like Siskel and Ebert
recycabley funny fossil turned fashion bitch to the famous Joan Rivers
and how can we ferget those famous theater bitches for the stuffed and the fluffed...brother-in-laws Waldorf and Statler
then there's x-files bitch and patti caker to the porn sites David Duchovny
i decided to wait a couple of months before give'n my non denominational opinion...as not to influence my popular blogville fan base...from goin'...or not goin'...to see this production
so a while back i went to see the musical revival of The Rocky Horror Show
first off…their promotional tee’s to purchase…ummm the designer obviously O.D'd on Kaopectate...cuz they looked like some lazy grade school macaroni and paste production!
though the theater in the rectangle box concept with the retractable floor seats were a cool theatrical hands on experience…see’n the show from the from the 20 yard line on the side was not (but that's only the fault of the bitchy usher)
the stage props were minimal...but not very memorable
now to the cast…
the Brad and Janet thespians did a great job emulate'n the croon'n couple
Columbia (who was one of the open'n ushers as well...did a much convinceable protrayal as that) but as Columbia?
instead...opt’n fer Adidas with orthopedics inserts
and her act’n abilities were about as innerest’n as a meatball sub
Magenta (who also played the other open'n usher)
Dr. Scott (who also played Eddie) was just buttered toast with no jam
the time warp dancers were as smooth as the gravey train…and totally into their support'n role…the blue mohawked mo' was like a punk swan lake
and grrrrrrrr to the Michael Hutchinson look’n tip toe tuliper
but the eye of the tiger of the nite was none other than Rocky
and even if he was a failure...and by no means did he disappoint vocally or visually…how could you not be transfixed on those 2 scoops of butter pecan ice cream…known as his ass!
completely full of life from beginn’n to end…no way the original Rocky…who was my co-pilot from an earlier blog…would’a pulled it off
the BIGGEST surprise of the nite was the narrator played by Don Shelby
he kept the storyline afloat...and added great comic relief...though...as bold and brave as it was for him to end the show by turn'n and walk'n off thru the curtains…(and YES i realize it’s nature’s way of bitch slapp’n all of us before we fade away into oblivion…but let me have this one shallow moment)
it had it’s humor and i get it...but with that said...let’s just say...
the intermission was none other than loud mouthed dame...Miss Smith
but to be honest…SHE STOLE THE WHOLE SHOW!...her performance was the cream that cured this some what of a canker sore production
not sure if she was there every nite…but the nite i was there...she was judge’n the costume contest…and she did not disappoint
she was like a fresh young Rip Taylor in support hose and heels...
and now what you’ve been wait’n for…the shanghai surprise 2nd place award goes to Franken-who-was-he-again-Furter!
first the good point…i simply loved the heels…PERIOD!...but his performance left me feel’n like i was on mine!
i get the whole “it's diversified” cast…a carbon copy of GLEE last year
but what’s with the Pablo Picasso beard?...and his make-up?
he did not embody his maker like i was hope'n in the least...he just reminded me more of Snorky from 1970's morn'n show The Banana Splits
though his sing'n voice at least kept me interested...i was not a huge fan of how the arrangements of the songs were sung however
his outfits looked like they were taken from the 75% off rack at hot topix
last but not least…the winner's fer the shanghai surprise award goes to the few annoy’n f*ckers in the crowd who insist on talk’n during the show
but if i wanna hear a bunch of wannabe...15 millisecond fame’n whores... talk’n back to the cast…
and unlike Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr...
all in all…this production was worth the price of the discount i paid for…and to hang with my friend Greta…but i won't be doin the time warp again...if anything...i'd rather be make'n time for a nap!
first timers would've appreciated this production if they never seen it live before and it did very well from what i've read...but this is my blog and it's only my opinion...if ya don't like it...get off my dress!