Thursday, March 21, 2013

well it's about time...BITCH!

there have been many bitches in my life...

and who could ferget this lady in the 90's...tell'n Delores...

and she's just Bitch from my fav-o-rit cult film in the 00's

but i finally got the BIGGEST bitch of them all on the horn today...

Bitch...thanx fer take'n time outta yer drunkfest busy day to chatter with me
so late in the week...WOW!'s that time again...fer the 6th annual "APRIL SHOWERS bring BITCH FLOWERS"...i've stuck with you like herpes to a hooker since the beginn'n....can you tell my legion of litters scattered thru-out the and what this whole concept is about?
it's my way of celebrating spring...a chance to bring people together to come celebrate spring...if it even shows up this year...HAHA

a lil birdie tells me...i landed you a HUGE guest this year...give it up gurl?
gurl...the one and only SHERRY VINE from New York City...and beyond...
google her...she's definitely worth it!

so it falls on 4/20 this year...that's very very innerest' obviously know what that date there some sorta cryptic message yer try'n to send? absolutely just sorta happened that way...of course i know what they're's the birthday of Adolf Hitler...
why would we celebrate THAT? *wink*wink*

yer event is THEE event pretty much kick'n off the spring season in the Minne-Apple...and gives everyone a chance to shed those winter blues...then spring board'n off the “April Showers” THEE event of the summer PRIDE fest in the Minne-Apple called "BITCH-N-BRUNCH" at SEVEN Steak and Sushi....
why would i wanna come there and deal with all that dirty downtown traffic?
this is our 6th year...and it's a perfect location to see the parade with the most square footage of the parade...coming and's a more diversified crowd that attends...from gays, straights, families with their kids, LGBT supporters...and of course this year back again by popular demand is DJ Lindsay Shiek who's spun at many of my events in the past.

there have many many requests fer you to host other over-the-top events thru-out the year...(of course 99% of those requests may or may not have come from me) have you ever thought about use'n these events to parlay into the other 2 neglected seasons of the year…by host’n a huge halloween masquerade ball fer the fall...
call'n it somethin' like "WICKED"...and perhaps a lovely holiday extravaganza called "holiday sours with BITCH FLOWERS" fer the winter season?
well Krsytal you and i have discussed this before...i am usually busy thru-out the holiday season working in Atlanta...but a halloween extravaganza is something i'm considering in the future

the non heterosexual community owes a HUGE thanx to the drag queens who started the revolution fer our equality at STONEWALL back in ‘69…(leave it to the homo’s to find the perfect numerical year) and we both started perform’n as performin’ illusionists (that’s drag queen fer you unachieve’n over eaters) when it was still considered more or less an abomination by right wing bible/wife beaters…and even by some in our own flock of ferries…and now it’s been almost 45 years since stonewall…do you think broadway productions like “Priscilla Queen of the Desert” and reality shows like RuPaul’s Drag Race” are help’n or hurt’n the cause fer equality?
wow! i think it's helping the cause especially if there's a lot of background story to the brings heart and understanding to people who choose to perform in something other than their natural gender...the conservative population seems to forget that many straight comedians and performers built their career on cross dressing in the beginning...
like Flip Wilson and Milton Berle among many others

if there was ONE dream celebrity to compliment yer many events...besides ME...who in yer world would you want it to be?
someone who's been covered by drag queens more than any other celebrity...of course
CHER...she could just tell stories all nite about her amazing life

if 100 bottles of chardonnay were one yer wall…and ya took one down…to pass it around…how many would you have left?
if i took one off the wall...that's like taking 100 there would be zero!

now we've come to the fav-o-rit part of the interview i like to call...

"can we talk about ME fer a change?"

basically...this is where you put on yer smartest Barbara Walters pant suit and ask me anything under the rainbow that you wanna know...and i mean A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G...well except about rainbows...cuz that's just fuck'n lazy journalism
how do you squeeze in 2 full time jobs? one being your day job...and then two being your night job that we call blow?
HA!...simple pimple....i just huff and puff...put on my knee pads and blow their house down!

i wanna thank the ever dramitic BITCH FLOWERS fer her wasted time today...
i don't mean she's a waste...i just meant...she seemed a lil get that straw outta yer chardonay bottle...and get yer act together gurl...we got a show to do!

touch me here to learn more about this opulant event

well...time fer me to make my video fer the kindly get off my dress!


  1. when can I expect the G.O.M.D. Variety hour? you'd make great television!

    1. i would LOVE to do a carol burnett/sonny and cher tribute comedy hour...hmm...i'll start write'n on that today :)

    2. i would LOVE to do a carol burnett/sonny and cher tribute comedy hour...hmm...i'll start write'n on that today :)