let's hop on our hotwheels and go back in time...shall we kittens!
it was the winter of 95...actually wait...let's go back a lil further...to the summer i did my 1st 69 in 91...when i met my very first minne-apple
"friend" i made off the 1-800-eat-me-i'm-a-danish phone line...
he was a tall blonde...which...unless you were peroxided pariahs like
sexually in fathom'n sinful fornicational thoughts with you in the room
but Curtis had a presence...and though it only amounted into an occasional hook-up from time to time...i was hooked on him...unfortunately he was also hooked...but on other "recreational entertainment" i couldn't participate in due to that republican toothpick...Nancy...in the 80's...gett'n under my skin
it took about 2 months to FINALLY find out what he did fer a live'n (or at least partime anyways)...as he was worried about my reaction apparently...
and told me i was never to grace the stage...but years later...there i was
and i would carry that same torch when i meet any potential interest...
fortunately for me...i've learned to not give a f*ck about it anymore!
so Curtis took me dowtown to the GAY 90's in downtown minne-apple...
i was totally over the moon when he FINALLY told me he was a perform'n illusionist at the GAY 90's and he could get me in to meet the performers
my 1st taste and fasination with the world of illusion...was thanx in part to being sick one day in 7th grade and watch'n the original Oprah Winfrey
his guest absolutely stunned me...and i was hooked like a junkie on heroin
Jimmy James was his name (and still is kittens...he's not gone to that glittered stage in the sky just yet)...but anywho...i swore it was Marilyn Monroe's reincarnation...back from the dead...cuz he sang "diamonds are a girls best friend" to perfection!
and of course Divine's brilliant performance in the original HAIRSPRAY
early one morn'n...at around 2 am...i received a call from Curtis tell'n me to get my ass dressed and meet him downstairs cuz he had a stretch limo with his bevy of beauties inside and wanted me to join them...ummm...ya right!
curiosity killed this C-U-Next-Time...and sure enough...i go to the window
downstairs...and seen a black stretch limo...wait'n fer me to get in...so i threw on a jacket and my combat boots and out the door i went
as the back door opened...inside i met the best Cher illusionist of the minne-apple...EVER!(Jessica)...Annie Lennox (Marty)...Marion( Jeff)...
Miles...Curtis and another gurl (who's name i can't remember)...who took me on a tour of the minne-apple i'll never ferget
over to the gal's house who was gonna make it after all...
got outta the limo...ran up to this open porched mansion...lifted up their even'n gowns...and proceeded to paint the porch in their alcoholic binge...
as me and the limo driver busted our asses in the limo laugh'n like mad
a postcard that could totally read "welcome to minneapolis...aint' it a drag!"
good times...g-o-o-d t-i-m-e-s!
2 years later...Curtis surprised me with tickets to see my high school hero
Boy George perform'n at the GAY 90's during his solo tour and could get me back stage to meet him...though it never transpired...i was on cloud 9
2 years after that... i entered and won a look-a-like contest at the 90's...for the release of Boy George's most excellent cd "cheapness and beauty"
take it like a man"...why not!
contest rules stated i was to recieve an autographed autobiography...and to my surprise...it was not christened with the BOY's john handcock
2nd times a charm right?...HA!...does NO go with WAY?
the nite of the show...i went balls to the walls full on disco devil look
and could barely contain my urinary track...from goin off track...for i was but a few short hours away from meet'n my eye opener at the tender and supple age of 13 when he said so eloquently "do you really want to hurt me"
i had paid for my cuz...his wife and her sis's tickets...all i wanted in return was a couple of cocktails...which my cuz had no problem with fill'n me up!
i ran into the mgr in the restroom of First Avenue where Boy was perform'n
so i proceeded to get drunk off my ass and tried to figer out my own way backstage...(though i didn't connect the dots til a year later when i was informed by a co-worker who was next to me that nite)...that as the Boy started in on his band's anthem of the 80's smash "karma chameleon"...
one of the reasons why i am still here today...my hero...my inspiration...
it took 3 times...but i FINALLY met Boy George during his incredible west end production of "TABOO" in London before it opened on Broadway...
(no...this DID NOT include a restroom romp...you pervie!)
i was leave'n some clothing shop in Leicester Square after spend'n more than i ever wanted to spend on some Ziggy Stardust tee...but so worth it
i was mortified yet again...my hero...and no words to speak...but at least i didn't feel like loose'n my lunch on him this time
it was like a huge domino effect happen'n...
if i never watched Phil...i never would've been hooked on Jimmy James...if i never watched Jimmy James...i never would've been hooked on Curtis...if i never watched Curtis on stage...i...well i probably would've gone to the GAY 90's at some point after i turned 21...but i would've never been hooked to perform there...and if Curtis never gave me tickets to see Boy George at the 90's...i would've never entered some look-a-like contest...
and if i never entered that look-a-like contest...i most undoubtedly would've never up-chucked on the BOY!
it's rare to meet someone whom you've looked up to all yer life or to meet someone who's inspired yer destination in life...i've met them both
10 years would pass before i would cross paths with Curtis again...a few months later...i had heard Curtis had gone to the glittered stage in the sky
then i think he'd just say "guuurl...you look SICK!" (ps...that's a good thing)
that you've ever seen...whirl'n...swirl'n...never blue...how could you go and die...what a lonely thing to do ~ Boy George