send in the clowns

every decade has brought a smile from ear to ear...to some non bastard or let's not ferget about the bastard children out there...snot riddled faces...

by simply slapp'n on 10 pounds of white donut powder...a Rudolph red molesterary smile...some sulfur smell'n brightly colored bucket of pubic hair...and a BIG RED NOSE!

the 50's brought us the ever loveable and very popular...

"BOZO THE CLOWN"

in the 60's...non and bastard children became addicted like crack addicts...

thanx to their lazy parents who couldn't be bothered to cook another good home cooked meal...by shove'n enough of Ronald McDonald down their throats...so daddy could shove his "macdonald" down mommies throat

by the 70's...the happy go lucky clown as we knew it needed a new angle...

and unfortunately this clown wasn't about putt'n a smile on a child's face so much...as he more or less was about wipe'n the smile off their face...

(hey i'm not promote'n his choice...just report'n it)

the 80's brought us klowns that found a more kourteous way to kill you...

with kustard kakes and kotton kandy spray...why not!!...in...

"KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE"

by the 90's...we wanted to get back to how they were meant to be...

but with a lil less happy go lucky and blood thirst...
and alot more booze...and bad attitudes

when it comes to clowns...you either really love them or really hate them...

there is no grey area when it comes to clowns...

well...unless you hop in yer delorean

with the new century already in progress...the clown is ready fer a full make-over once again...and thanx to the wonders of technology and YouTube...10 pounds of white donut power...a big red nose...a Rudolph red molesterary smile and that bucket of colorful pubic hair isn't needed...

let me introduce to you this cringe worthy clown of "christianity" and June Allison's "member of the not so many months left club" i'm afraid...
Pat Robertson...oops...i mean...

"CRAPPY...the counsel'n crypt keeper clown"

so CRAPPY has give'n some laughable advice thru-out his entire career...

like this beauty...where he gives advice to women with the husbands' with the wander'n eye...basically say'n...

"you will do it!...you will like it!..and YOU WILL SAY N-O-T-H-I-N-G!"

or this brilliant piece of wiggle room you are allowed when yer wife decides not to be a total submissive bottom

and this recent gem on how the non heterosexuals in the great city of SAN FRAN are use'n Smeagol's ring to give other people their "stuff" 

i'm sorry CRAPPY...but it looks like it's time to cash in yer depends...

and start pick'n out yer plot!

but religous relics aren't the only ones with a funny bone outta place...

recently pasta became the centerfold fer what is consider OLD news by now

let me introduce to you...

"NOODLES...the pasta pinhead clown"

BARILLA's CEO Guido Barilla..oops...NOODLES...

(and lets be fair non heterosexuals and those who support us...this was HIS words...and NOT the rest of the the people who work under him...and help pay fer his outlandish lifestyles of the rich and pathetically annoy'n...so pleez don't throw stones...slurs...or pull a shiv on them after their shift...ok)

so NOODLES came out last week declare'n that his families pasta was made fer the traditional subservient wife beat'n and children scorned non homosexual families fer over 136 years...and throw'n a non heterosexual family into it's advertisements this late in the game...

 would be like take'n a classic like DePalma's masterpiece...

 "CARRIE"

and turn'n it into hollyweird's refried crap on toast fer the instant oatmeal generation

the backlash was brought to a boil'n point instantly thru-out the globe...

and Buitoni turned down the flames by become'n the super hero pasta that saved the day!

apparently...NOODLES had a change of heart when he realized ostrasize'n a group of kittens in this day and age...is pretty much total social suicide...

by promptly retracted his comments (a few days later)

and made history by stepp'n outta his families shadows and help'n bridge the gap between societal family differences

so there ya have it kittens...a clown without make-up...

is just a baboon with a big mouth!

now get off my dress!