we are bombarded by it...24/7...from sunrise to sunset
from morn'n wood
to gett'n as moist as a betty crocker cake in the middle of the nite
you can't escape it…no matter how HARD you try!
it's on all our NEED-2-KNOW-NOW nightly news programs
by the check-out counter at yer fav-o-rit non denominational grocer
from the locker room...
to the library
i heard they’re even passing out condoms to kindergarteners these days
BUTT wait there's more...
rub-a-dub-dub…3 men in a tub
(menage a trois were socially acceptable and encouraged even back then)
little bo peep…"lost her sheep"
(ya right...they're clearly talk'n about devirginization here…who knew?)
little miss muffet...blah blah blah...then along came a spider
(looks like missy fergot to add spermicidal jams and jellies to the area)
from goo-goo...
to GAGA
from the playground...
to the priesthood
from KD Lang...
to Katy Perry
from Crystal Gayle...
to Krystal Kleer
from Bettie Page...
to Betty White
from Elvis’s hips...
to Jagger’s lips
from a half breed...
to a half twat
from a BOY who looked like a gurl (incidentally this BOY is also on tour so get yer tickets here kittens before it's too late…see you Thursday @ Mystic Lake)
to a girl who now is a man
from an artist formerly known as annoying...
to a former artist that just became annoying
it can be used by one Miss Stone...
or it could just get you dethroned
it's animal instinct...
it'll make you think
it can be absolutely fabulous
or it can be an absolute mess
with a woman
(ps...it's only visually appeal'n if you like that kinda thing and those that do...ummm get some help...i'm not endorse'n necrophilia)
or a man
(call me Henry...i'm available)
just make 100% sure...you know what yer doin and what you want...
or GET OFF MY DRESS!
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