Monday, January 2, 2012

A.S.S.H.O.L.E

why not start the new year out right...right?...i'm talk'n to YOU right!

hello 2012...thanx fer make'n it here in one piece and not gett'n yer foot caught up in all that rapture that every nut case was gett'n into

no...i'm not talk'n about this one silly rabbit

i'm talk'n about the big money make'n religious stock market crash of 2011

now i'm not say'n these religious space cadets had no right to their beliefs
but perhaps they should'a had the courage to ask fer a brain since they have no heart for any sorta concept of reality

i have no prob with those who think that some Almighty magician
turns the lights on every morn'n and lives beyond the puffiness up above

it's just his batshit crazy fan club that freaks the hell outta me!

or those who believe the J man really appeared here?

call me crazy...but i think the image looks alot more like this guy myself

now where was i?...oh ya...i could care less who you ALL MIGHTY alienation zombie zealots of the LORD or those who CHOOSE to believe in whatever it is you believe in...i'm still gonna be there for ya...for as long as i possibly can

well...unless you believe in these visually painful kanker sores
(i know i'm perpetuate'n their existance...so right here and now...i will no longer feature by compare'n or contrast'n these financially stable
clitorectomies ever again...in any more of my ramblin's)

and with all the other shinanigans i dealt with this past year that you've read about in previous blogs...i had no time to throw on my think'n cap and come up with any new useless resolutions for this year...hell...i don't even believe i'm look'n forward to a single thing this year yet...

well...except fer the release of the Queen's new movie W.E on feb 3rd

then her ROYALNESS doin' her first Superbowl performance on feb 5th

and her much anticipated new album and parfume due at the end of march

it's not that i'm not excited about anything else with a fresh new beginn'n of a fresh new year...but at the very least...i know i can always count on the QUEEN to deliver and never disappoint!

there are many other things i don't believe in though...but before i continue...i'd like to apologize in advance...it seems my turrets has decided to sit in on this blog

i don't believe in the theory if you do too much masterbation...
that some dilusional Almighty will kill a poor defenseless kitty...at the very most all it'll give ya is rug burn if ya don't use lotsa lube...trust me on this!

i don't believe in that tired archaic phrase "love at first sight"
unimaginable lusty thoughts of fornicational pleasures yes...but not love
Colin...call me...i am single...i will help you!

i don't believe in the heavens above or the steam rooms down below
unless yer referr'n to the hell the Joe Manganiello's of the world put me thru...just to look like a little slice of heaven in a moment of time

and lastly...i don’t believe in use'n gratuitous vulgarities when try'n to make sense of somethin' that clearly makes no sense...
well...unless of course yer one of these fucktards try'n to make sense of the bullshit their spew'n to the masses with asses for brains this year

like we really need Another Sorry Shit Head Organize’n Lies Everywhere…or for short…the members of A.S.S.H.O.L.E…or for even shorter…this year's G.O.P contenders that have made a career outta fear and fright…without any insight about the non existant non heterosexual agenda!

i'm sorry...but this is one g*d-damned-non-heterosexual-f*ck'n-cock-suck'n-trailer-park-luv'n-lilac-sniffer who ain't buy'n into their bullshit!

let's welcome today's guests...come on down...yer the next contestants on

contestant #1...mrs. crazy batshit Bachmann...what's yer bid today?
"they [the non heterosexuals]can marry a man if they're a woman or they can marry a woman if they're a man"

WTF?...Shells...puhleez stop MAKE'N SO MUCH SENSE!!

i'm sorry c*nt burp...but let me help you with that nail and hammer

contestant #2...mr holy sac wrangle'n Santorum...gimme yer bid pleez!

"It's like holding up this and saying this glass of water is a glass of beer. Well you can call it a glass of beer, it's not a glass of beer, it's a glass of water. And water is what water is. Marriage is what marriage is."

drrrrrrrrr...i'm sorry...can you repeat your answer?
(oh btw...nice spray tan fuck nut!)

so lemme get this "straight" (pun intended) yer bid is that the family is not a family without a mami and a papi...correct? is that yer final bid? hmmm...so in the case of insest and rape victims...children ought to get to know and flourish...without psychological repercussions...their violent family roots rather than be raised by non heterosexuals?...i totally get where yer come'n from dick smacker...NOT!

contestant #3...mr. anal rimmer Romney...do you have an intelligent bid?

"i think at the time the Constitution was written...it was pretty clear that marriage is between a man and a woman...and i don't believe the Supreme Court has changed that"

oh geez...i'm sorry cock cheeze...you have been outbid for think'n too much about not think'n about it...goodbye and enjoy yer lifetime supply of bullshit cuz no one else is buy'n it

up next contestant #4...mr. buttpirate Perry...how much do you want to bid?

"our friends in New York six weeks ago passed a statute that said marriage can be between two people of the same sex...and you know what?...that's New York...and that's their business...and that's fine with me...that is their call....if you believe in the 10th amendment...stay out of their business"

awwww...i'm sorry but you don't stand a chance flip flopp'n and stumblin' on yer statements...but thanx fer play'n ass wipe!

contestant #5...mr. glory holer Gingrich...what do you want to bid?

i think those for whom the only issue that really matters is the definition of marriage...i won't get their support...i accept that as reality

well that's very generous of you to suggest that...and i give you credit for lay'n it out without block'n it up with a bunch of big words...but you are after all...a hypocritical geriatric faithless twat lick who can't seem to make up his mind and keep it together...so i'm sorry but you will loose this round

and last and the very least...contestant #6...mr. rectal exam Ron Paul
what would you like to bid on this issue that will surely be a factor in the coming election this next fall?

“i think the government should just be out of it...i think it should be done by the church or private contract...and we shouldn’t have this argument...who's married and who isn’t married...i have my standards but i
shouldn’t have to impose my standards on others...other people have their standards and they have no right to impose their marriage standards on me.”

wow!...there is some intelligence out there after all

ooops!...wait a minute...hold the salami...spoke too soon!

though i can't say i don't disagree with alot you haven't really said before...or hold a grudge against yer past ramblin's...you totally remind me of someone i would probably not trust...cuz after all..yer an A.S.S.H.O.L.E!

well that's all for today kittens...i'm Marcus...i mean...Rod Roddy
(hehehe...i said ROD RODDY) see you next time on...
"gimme a price and i'll endorse yer anti non heterosexual agenda that will threaten your traditional non homosexual marital tendencies"

i'm not say'n this fruitloop shouldn't have his voice heard...but ya might wanna tone it down a bit merry mary on the contrary!

ya know what...fer the most part...it always revolves around "traditional family values" with these A.S.S.H.O.L.E's...the typical right winged hypocritical religiously deranged fuckwad answer

don't get me wrong...i'm all about family...there's even a couple in my own family that i'm sure i could sell on ebay or trade with the taliban at times

but the code phrase "traditional family values" is marketed by the righteous right wingers to justify discrimination against those who they see different from their values and tarnished morality laws...butt like anal warts...will never be removed permanantly!

remember the days when "traditional family values" belonged to these guys

unfortunately...economical and social times have changed and now these A.S.S.H.O.L.E's will be come'n out in their own sitcom very soon...feel free to play the background theme music while sing'n along

here's the story of a bunch of A.S.S.H.O.L.E’s

who want nothing but to cause panic and fear

all of them had brains of shit...like the other

the youngest compared marriage to beer

here's the story…of a gal named Michelle

with an agenda and non homosexual fruitcake of her own

and the other four A.S.S.H.O.L.E's...full of dumbo doo

well...this is all well known

till the one day when these A.S.S.H.O.L.E’s meet this fellow

and they think they'll be eat'n him for lunch

this group can somehow kiss their own ass

that is why they all became the HATED Bunch

the HATED Bunch…

the HATED Bunch

that's the way they all became the HATED Bunch

puhleez bitches...only one of yooz are gonna come outta the cornwack'n convention alive to step into the ring with the prez this fall (only to be annihilated)...this i'm aware of...but get down off the wood if you think that'll win ya the white house...and puhleez...get off my dress!

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