though more commonly known as the land of 9,999 bottoms...depend'n on which non heterosexual bar i happen to stumble into on any given nite...but there are many many many other greatness's that have come outta the north star state...fer instance...
thee legendary songbird/pre-PETA activist with the pig tails and untouchable ruby slippers who had an insatiable appetite fer role players into fourgies
thee hottest players in the league...the Minnesota twins
and of course no one can ever remember to ferget the thee unintentionally internationally unknown perform'n illusionist of their own universe
but alas...there is even one more HUGELY SUCCESSFUL body of greatness...that stands out above ALL thee above...(well...only cuz today's topic is all about her and her current amaze'n presence on the tellie)
she's been molested by an obsessed over grown ape...
with an ego the size of the Empire State...and i ain't talk'n about Melania Trump
much like Miss Spears has done fer her amaze'n drag show concert in Vegas
married mother of 2 fer 25 years...try'n to hold her marriage...her family and her dignity...with acceptance...love...and change
from the bright lights on broadway to the silver screen in hollyweird...
and everything in between...JESSICA LANGE is one of thee most admired...incredibly gifted and diverse actresses of our time
captivate'n a new generation of gothic tales and a huge legion of fans...
portray'n the scorned wife fer the afterlife as CONSTANCE LANGDON...in the FX masterpiece
by season 2....JESSICA proved to be even more deliciously disturbed...
play'n a reformed alcoholic nun...SISTER JUDE MARTIN...for the deformed and defamed...
and gives a psychotically stellar performance with her pipes...that should be covered by every queen in train'n heels from coast to coast...before attempt'n any top 40 number in the big gurl shoes...and no sunday show tunes beer bust should do without...in...
the follow'n year...JESSICA would return as thee ultimate SUPREME...
EVAN PETERS...as hot to trot Jimmy Darling...more commonly known as Lobster boy
MICHAEL CHIKLIS...as strong man Dell Toledo
EMMA ROBERTS...as fortune tell'n Maggie Esmerelda
FRANCES CONROY...as wealthy socialite Gloria Mott
(beat'n out Miss Ross by a million miles i might add)
as FIONA GOODE...master'n the "7 wonders" of witchcraft...in...
as FIONA GOODE...master'n the "7 wonders" of witchcraft...in...
and finally....after months of withdraw...the wait is almost over kittens...
on oct 8th...Miss Lange will return fer her final masterpiece performance...that i predict will give her another Emmy come award season next year...in the best macabre series on television since the MUNSTERS...as ELSA MARS...the narcissistically manipulative owner and ring master of the cabinet of curiosities...set in Jupiter,FL durin' the 1950's...in...
and no side show would be complete without it's cast of famed freaks...
include'n the return of KATHY BATES...as one helluva bearded lady...Ethel Darling
SARAH PAULSON...as the 2 headed lady...Bette and Dot Tattler
ANGELA BASSET...as the 3-breasted lady...Desiree Dupree
but the biggest freak of them all looks like it'll be the sinisterly sensation...
with a plethora of endless costume creations that is AMERICAN HORROR STORY to choose from fer yer hallowed eve'ness celebration right around the corner...start yer wednesday nite out right and switch on FX this oct...
and get off my dress!
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